love letter
~soft smile~ In some ways, that’s what this blog has been for the nearly three years it has existed. A love letter, of sorts … but really, so very much more.
It’s been a journal into which i can pour myself in a way that is both private and yet … not. Endlessly, all my life, i’ve scribbled in notebooks, molded my thoughts and feelings with words, but a diary is something different. There’s no interaction, and, although one could argue that you can turn to your friends for interaction, it’s still not the same. i’d almost say one has to be a blogger, or a reader of blogs to understand.
As i read through what i’ve typed, thus far, i can see that there is something of a feeling that i am about to announce an ending, that i’m saying goodbye, but that is not actually the case. It may even be that i am saying hello, for the first time, that i am emerging from some sort of blog-cocoon, unfurling my wings, and giving it a try without a thought about who might be reading it, who might be reacting, and who may or may not be impressed.
i feel soft, a little vulnerable, and distinctly female right now. This is my place. Mine. And, though there is some pain, some underlying sadness, and more than a little wistfulness, i think it’s time i made it a love letter to myself.
Be beautiful, my friends. ~kisses for the world~
I was starting to feel a bit sad, I had only found your blog!
I think you are right, a different mindset. A love letter to yourself.
Something we all should be doing.
Thank you, Gray. i’m sorry you found my blog during a bit of a maudlin slump. i’m coming out of it. ~smile~ Will be getting some loose ends tied up and the tone should be better. Thank you so much for reading.
elise
There seems to be a bit too much past tense in those last two sentences.
Please tell me that is a typo.
~frown~ Those two sentences, sassy?
elise
I guess I didn’t count your kisses as a sentence, more of a sentiment.
This one – “And, though there is some pain, some underlying sadness, and more than a little wistfulness, i think it’s time i made it a love letter to myself.”
“made” sounded just a bit pluperfect.
Perhaps just my own fears speaking – you’ve written a lot of really great stuff that is gone now. I don’t want this to disappear too.
sassy,
First, i’m not going anywhere … just changing some of the focus, which was somewhere that isn’t really a “there” anymore. That’s all. ~smile~
Second … what’s disappeared?
elise
Isn’t it protocol not to mention the disappeared?
“It doesn’t make sense. It isn’t even good grammar. What the hell does it mean to disappear somebody?” from Catch 22
If I can name the posts/blogs which have been disappeared, will they get reappeared?
sassy,
i’m getting more and more confused. Do you mean the stuff about G? All that has just been made private … i figured there was no need to make freakishly obsessive prying eyes cause herself pain over and over and over. Because she still tries, on this blog and on the writing blog. Other than that, I don’t really make anything i’ve written disappear.
Is there something you’re particularly looking for?
elise
Sorry, elise. I guess I am being obfuscatory this weekend. I was referring to some of the G related stuff.
(and the transitory nature of blogs in general – see how quickly I disappeared mine?)
Ah, glad i understand now. It’s not gone, just invisible. ~smile~ i’m sort of a blog purist. i figure if i’ve put words out there, i can’t just delete them. Making them private is my only concession to this rule … oh, and password protecting some things, when i feel as though they belong in the blog timeline, but are for only a particular set of eyes.
elise